Like many of us on a path towards more alignment, expression and purpose, you may also be finding it hard to attract and connect with a strong community of conscious and like-minded humans, affectionately known as your ‘Soul Tribe’. With the ability to connect with anyone, all the time (online) we find ourselves crowded with ‘connections for connections-sake’ and lacking intention or curation with those we spend time with. Maybe you can resonate with this?
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”
– Jim Rohn
Many say we are ‘more connected than ever before,’ which is very true and exciting for the online world. We can see and feel though, that culturally and on the ground we are lacking this sense of connection and community with our soul tribe. As people who are seeking more purpose and a more aligned lifestyle, having the company of aligned people with similar values and beliefs is incredibly important.
The human experience is created by the elements of psychology, physiology, sociology and ecology. All of these are required for us to thrive. Some of these we can deal with on our own, but others, particularly sociology and ecology, require that we be in community with and connection to others of like heart and mind.
It is said that the environments and the company we keep are two of the greatest influencers on our own experience and behaviors, which very much define the overall quality of our lives and the level of happiness, contentment and fulfillment we are able to achieve. As such, finding your soul tribe is extraordinarily important if you value the above things.
But how exactly do we go about finding and attracting our soul tribe? How—and where—do we need to show up in order to align ourselves with those we feel closest to in the jungles of social media and more importantly, in real life time and space?Technology is shuffling the way society functions and operates at the most fundamental levels, especially in relation to forming and connecting with like minded community and our soul tribe. So in this modern world, it’s extremely important to understand the underlying principles and mindsets that lead us to align with and attract our soul tribe.
I dive into this topic in significant depth in my new book Modern Tribe which I wrote to address the very problem of finding your tribe in the modern, digital age. Below you’ll find the formula and some simple but powerful practices for attracting your soul tribe effortlessly—as a natural extension of your self expression and who you are.
The Formula for Finding Your Soul Tribe
Self-awareness + Expression + Intention = Attracting your soul tribe without constantly ‘trying’
Like with most things on our hero’s journey of personal evolution and spiritual growth, we need to start with self-awareness.
+ When you envision the future experience you will have, what does it feel like?
+ What values do you embody?
Usually these will be very similar, if not the same as the values your soul tribe holds. Maybe it’s openness, creative expression, adventure and nature or something else. Getting clear on your values and personal vision is extremely important for finding your soul tribe. You want to find the group of people who share these values and vision. No matter what you value and what your vision is, there is a similar-minded group of people out there waiting for you somewhere. With 7 billion people on the planet, you can be sure your soul tribe exists.
Sit still in stillness in an environment that inspires you, meditate and visualize what your ideal tribe would feel like. Not seeing what it looks like, but what it feels like!
2. Express and Embody
Now that you are aware of this feeling you would like to experience, your challenge is to actually embody and express these values in your life fully. This is the most challenging step! It is easy to think up some words and values, but it takes a bit of vulnerability and commitment to embody them fully. However, this is crucial to attracting your soul tribe.
To help, try writing a personal vision statement about your new story and the new values you are committing to living by. “I am present, listening to my intuition, expressing my creativity and sharing my love of biomimicry,” for example. This is a powerful affirmation that you can repeat to yourself daily to help you stay calibrated to your values and vision.
Acting in full alignment with these values and vision is hands down the fastest way to attracting and aligning yourself with your soul tribe.
Write this somewhere that you will see it often and make it a habit to read it and feel it every morning before you enter your day!
The next and final step you need to take in attracting your soul tribe is consciously and intentionally placing yourself in the right places and spaces. You can express your values for calmness, presence and sustainability but if you put yourself in bars and clubs where there tends to be a shallow culture, you may be misaligning yourself with where your soul tribe is locationally in the world. Alternatively, you can go to yoga and meditation classes or volunteer at a community garden and experience much higher locational alignment with where your soul tribe is likely to be.
Ask yourself, where might your soul tribe hang out? Where would you most likely strike a spontaneous conversation with your next best friend that shares the same values and/or vision with you? Immerse yourself and express yourself in these places as much as possible! Be open to exploring new places to find your soul tribe. Don’t get discouraged if the first few places don’t foster the connection you had hoped for. Often times they do! But other times it’s a bit longer journey. Keep at it because soul tribes operate on the network effect, which means once you get connected to a few people in your soul tribe, most everyone in the world is connected to those people within a few degrees of separation.
You don’t personally need to know everybody. You just need to know a few people and through the wonders and interwoven web of social media and personal networks you will soon be connected to an international soul tribe of like-minded people.
How to Create Even More Connection and Tribe
I believe that fostering meaningful connection and community is the solution to many of our world’s biggest problems. Many of the planetary challenges we face—war, poverty, environmental destruction—stem from a lack of deep soul connection and community. We need to reimagine how we live together. There is a new living philosophy based off tribal living and sharing that is emerging that I believe addresses the fundamental issues at the core of our disconnection: I call it the Modern Tribe.